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Thursday, February 16, 2006

(Not so) Future Teacher Attire?

This has been a miserable cold and flu season. Kids have been absent left and right, and when they're NOT absent, half the time they sound like they're about to hack up their left lung. My partner was out for 3 weeks because her son caught something at a day care; the teacher next door to me has been out for 3 days because she caught something from one of her kids. And with today being 80 degrees, and tomorrow predicted to drop to 40 degrees, we're bound to have another wave of illness rock the schoolhouse.
This topic got a nice discussion going in the breakroom today during lunch. Someone mentioned that teaching had made the top of the list for "germy jobs." (like that took a brain scientist to figure out) And it is so totally true. When I was in engineering, I NEVER got sick. Since I've been a teacher, I've become a regular at the local Primacare center. "Oh, hello Mister Teacher, what is it this time? Strep Throat? Sinus Infection? Ebola?"
So I suggested that we might all want to start wearing full-body radiation suits or at least the protective covering of a clean room suit you might see in a chip manufacturing plant. (I refer you to the picture for a quick modeling of the suit by yours truly.) This would prevent any unwanted germs, viruses, or bacteria from being transferred from the kids.
We would of course need nice sturdy iron tongs to handle tests and classwork, and anything else that needed to be picked up from the kids each day. A sharps disposal box (labeled "Biohazard") would be provided for each classroom.
Can't you just picture the classroom of the future?

4 comments:

----^---- said...

Sick all the time Mr. Teacher?
Welcome to a part of parenthood.

Anonymous said...

Ah, Mr. Teacher, I feel your pain. This is my first year of retirement from teaching and I haven't had a sniffle. Just discovered your blog and as an old third grade teacher, I'm loving it.

Mister Teacher said...

Sure, make me envious, why doncha?
My first year, all I really caught was a cold, but it lasted on and off from Thanksgiving through Spring Break. . .Since then, I've had strep throat twice, lost my voice twice. . .Thankfully no pink eye yet.

Bonnie4T said...

I think that you've got it the wrong way. Make the STUDENTS wear it. Uniforms? We don't need no stinking uniforms!!