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Saturday, February 11, 2006

Illegal aliens to invade DISD?

Big news coming out of the Dallas ISD is that one of the trustees has suggested hiring up a bunch of illegal aliens to teach bilingual classes at our schools. I'm not sure exactly what this guy was smoking, but I have a feeling that it contains little to no nicotine. Let's examine the pros and cons for this out-of-the-box (or at least the gourd) suggestion:

PRO
Our kids would learn a lot by observing a teacher from another culture.
CON
Do we really want our kids emulating an alien? It's bad enough when they roar like Chewbacca or say "OWWWWWWWWCH" like E.T. -- who knows WHAT kind of behavior they'd pick up from Miss Zebulon?

PRO
Since they're illegal, they can't complain to the government if they don't get paid fair wages.
CON
Since they can't complain to the government, they would probably have to go to "Uncle Marco" to complain, and the last guy who had dealings with Uncle Marco is currently hanging from his boxers at the top of the Texas Cliffhanger.

PRO
This hiring would provide a solution to the teacher shortage crisis, at least in Texas.
CON
If there is no teacher shortage crisis, people might no longer think teachers deserve to be paid extra for their long hours, infinite patience, and stressful working conditions. Oh wait. I guess that's really not an issue.

PRO
Only college-educated illegal aliens would be considered.
CON
Acceptable "colleges" include Tony Roberts College, the Brownsville Institute of Culinary Tastes and Health, Que U., and the University of North Carolina.

Will the pros outweigh the cons? Only time will tell.

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