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Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Stick with the George Foreman, kids

I saw an article in the paper today talking about how the Arlington school district is cracking down on violations of their dress code by disallowing "grills," among other things. Are you familiar with grills? Yeah, I thought I was too -- though I haven't eaten at Burger King in a while. Flame broiled? No, that's not what I'm talking about.
Grills are described as "mouth jewelry," though I'm sure to the users, they have much fancier associated adjectives, along the lines of "six-diamond, white gold, oral enhancers."
It wasn't so long ago that kids hated even the thought of having to wear braces. Yet now they are em-bracing (sorry, couldn't resist) these new accessories. I have to admit, I don't really think that I've ever seen the real thing. I know I've heard the term though, because I've had some kids who have taken their Nestlé crunch bar foil wrappers and molded them down over their teeth and called them grills.
You can't possibly eat with these things on, and I can't imagine that talking is easy either. Of course, some of these kids are hard to understand on their best day anyway, but that's beside the point.
The engineer in me can't help but think about the conductivity levels of a mouth full of metal. I keep getting images of the poor little boy from Poltergeist, and his Braces Gone Wild.
Let's keep the grills in the backyards for barbecues and on the fronts of old cars! And perhaps we can find some other way for our kids to get their daily dose of iron...


Phineus said...

Let me see your grill. Well let me see your what? Your grill. Yu-yu-your grill. The top row's diamonds and the bottom row's gold.

HappyChyck said...

OMG! Thanks for the laugh! I haven't had any students with grills yet, which is just as well. Sometimes I get distracted wonder how their multiple face piercing aren't distracting to them from eating, blinking, breathing... Grills...what's next?

Mister Teacher said...

I think next is a classroom full of kids wearing oversized analog clocks around their necks, à la Flava Flave.

EHT said...

The kind of grill you refer is new to me, however, grills exist in elementary school all the time. We have the boys restroom and the grills or grils depending on your point of view. For some reason "girls" is on of our most misspelled words. It's right up there with "flase" instead of "false".

On your way back from the carnival stop by my place and celebrate my 100th post.:)

Mike in Texas said...

What's wrong with wearing oversized analog clocks around your neck?

I had a crown put in this past week. The dentist asked me if I wanted metal or ceramic and claims that I asked for his opinion, and told him to do what he thought was best which was metal. Of course, he asked me all this while I was gassed to the gills with nitrous oxide. He claims I told him to "pimp my mouth"

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