9 things to do over the summer

Today is officially the first day of summer vacation! Sure, we had Saturday and Sunday off, but today is the first WORK day that is not a WORK day...

Pretty much all I've done today is visit the doctor to get my twisted knee x-rayed, and played Facebook poker. But here is a handy little list of things to do if you get bored over the next few months.

1) Alphabetize something -- your comic book collection, your DVDs, your credit cards, whatever. Sing the ABC song at the top of your lungs as you do it. Bonus: Leave the windows open.

2) Try out for a reality show. When is So You Want to Be a Superhero coming back on again, anyway??

3) Try out an unusual job. If you live here in the states, hire yourself out as a rickshaw driver or a mountain guide. If you live in another country, seek employment as a naked cowboy.

4) Walk a mile in another man's shoes. I would recommend a man whose foot size is very close to your own.

5) Improve your artistic skills. Start by perfecting the circle, then replicate Guernica.

6) Prepare for the next school year. You can do this by laying out the pair of socks you plan to wear on the first day of school. Consider yourself prepared.

7) Travel. I hear Butte, Montana is lovely this time of year.

8) Every time you receive change at a restaurant, ask if they would like to donate a dollar to the ITF, or Individual Teacher Fund.

9) Get married. Well, at least that's something that I plan on doing this summer. Might not work for everyone with such short notice.