9 things to do over the summer

Today is officially the first day of summer vacation! Sure, we had Saturday and Sunday off, but today is the first WORK day that is not a WORK day...

Pretty much all I've done today is visit the doctor to get my twisted knee x-rayed, and played Facebook poker. But here is a handy little list of things to do if you get bored over the next few months.

1) Alphabetize something -- your comic book collection, your DVDs, your credit cards, whatever. Sing the ABC song at the top of your lungs as you do it. Bonus: Leave the windows open.

2) Try out for a reality show. When is So You Want to Be a Superhero coming back on again, anyway??

3) Try out an unusual job. If you live here in the states, hire yourself out as a rickshaw driver or a mountain guide. If you live in another country, seek employment as a naked cowboy.

4) Walk a mile in another man's shoes. I would recommend a man whose foot size is very close to your own.

5) Improve your artistic skills. Start by perfecting the circle, then replicate Guernica.

6) Prepare for the next school year. You can do this by laying out the pair of socks you plan to wear on the first day of school. Consider yourself prepared.

7) Travel. I hear Butte, Montana is lovely this time of year.

8) Every time you receive change at a restaurant, ask if they would like to donate a dollar to the ITF, or Individual Teacher Fund.

9) Get married. Well, at least that's something that I plan on doing this summer. Might not work for everyone with such short notice.

12 Things Teachers Should Do Over Summer Break

I certainly hope that by NOW, everyone is on summer break. Here in Texas, this is our second week off from school. If there are indeed any poor shlubs out there who are still in session, well first of all, I feel very sorry for you, and second of all, I don't feel as bad when I realize that you probably started way later than us or had an obscenely long Christmas Break.



Regardless, I've put together a little list of things that have worked for me in the past and/or things that I am trying now in the present. These are things that all teachers should do over the summer to be prepared for the new school year which SEEMS so very very far away, but which we all know will sneak up on us like a new reality-star scandal.



Here are 12 Things Teachers Should Do Over Summer Break (in no particular order):



1) Sleep for 24 hours straight at least once (just don't do this in late August).

2) Sharpen as many pencils as you can. I did this last summer, and now I think I'm set for the next decade.

3) Try to avoid getting sun burnt.

4) Read as much as you can for pleasure. We all know that's nearly impossible during the school year proper.

5) Exercise, exercise, exercise!!

6) Follow the news and happenings of the World Wrestling Entertainment industry so that you'll be able to converse with the kids in the fall.

7) Find a trivia night at a local restaraunt or bar. Try to win.

8) Wait impatiently for the final season of Lost.

9) Make some funny YouTube videos. Or at least your own personal version of funny.

10) Rent a backhoe and clean out your guest room, office, or bedroom -- whichever part of the house/apartment that needs it most.

11) Take a field trip. Or two or three.

12) Read some fun blogs.