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Sunday, June 18, 2006

Top 5 Things* I Am Not Missing This Summer

I have been rolling this list around in my mind for several weeks now, so I thought it was finally time to put it into print. It should be noted that there is an ASTERISK. These are the Top 5 things -- non-kid-related -- that I am not missing. If I were to get started on things that the kids do, this could easily turn into a top 500 list...
And so, without any further ado (or skidoo), here we go.

5) Having to replace the lightbulb in my overhead machine --
I rely on my overhead the way Horatio Sanz relies on deep dish pizza; it's a must-have! This might earn me the scorn of some veteran teachers out there, but what can I say, I need it to do my job efficiently. And sometimes it seems as if my machine is trying to provide proof for chaos theory -- if a butterfly flaps its wings in China... my overhead bulb burns out. Last year, I must have had to replace that thing seven or eight times. I've owned my house for close to a year now, and I have yet to replace a lightbulb.

4) As Rob Schneider used to say... "Makin' copies!" --
I never minded so much when I was making my own copies. But this year, the school really cracked down hard on numbers -- so much so that us teachers were actually prohibited from making our own copies. They hired someone to make all of the copies for the entire school. This was, needless to say, a rough transition, and for a while there, 8.5x11 paper was a hotter commodity than gold or even gasoline! At least I won't have to worry about copies for another couple of months.

3) The tendency of my electric pencil sharpener to sharpen the wood rather than the lead --
As a teacher, I feel like I sharpen about 200 pencils a day because my kids are constantly breaking them. (Ah, but this list isn't about the kids, right?) So it is incredibly frustrating when I pull the ol' number 2 out, and instead of a usable writing implement, I have what basically amounts to a stake. Hey, maybe if I lived in California and had to fend off vampires, then I wouldn't mind as much. But here in Texas, I never have vampires in class, just the occasional zombie, and an improperly sharpened pencil just won't work against them.

2) Burrito day in the cafeteria --
'Nuff said!

1) Our professional dress code --
I know that some teachers get to wear jeans, T-shirts, and casual clothes all year long, but not us. For most of the year, I am required to wear a button-down shirt and tie. For me, this means a long-sleeve shirt because I've just never been into the Dilbert look. This attire is not always so pleasant, especially when the temperature is in the 90s. Sure, we have the "summer dress code," when we can wear golf shirts, but this year, they didn't allow that until early May, with less than a month of school left. Now I'm not saying we should have teachers walking around in halter tops and banana hammocks, but it would certainly be nice to at least have a regular casual Friday.

And that, my friends, is the list. As always, please feel free to share your own opinions and items.


Lady S said...

Ugh, dress codes. When I get up in the morning I kinda wish we had one, but I wish for the khakis and polo shirt kind of dress code.

Mrs. T said...

Top 5: (in no particular order)
1. The Early Morning hour that I have to be at school. 7:30-ugh.
2. Correcting papers.
3. Being "on" all day.
4. Having every minute of my day timed to the exact minute. Class ends at 9:12, not 9:15, not 9:10...
5. Coming up with creative, worthwhile lessons for a diverse group of teenagers that meet district, state and national standards and benchmarks.

Mister Teacher said...

Don't complain about having to be at school at 7:30! I had to be there every day this year at seven o'clock! And I am NOT a morning person...

Mrs. T said...

7:00? What, are you guys all part rooster? That's painful to imagine, not being a morning person myself.

Mike in Texas said...

I too would be happy with khakis and a polo shirt year round.

I'm with mister teacher on the tie and short sleeves look. Of course, at my school the thermostat is computer controlled (a cost saving measure run by a company over 100 miles away). My sensor is usually 5-9 degrees off, according to our maintenance people so long sleeves, even in the dead of winter, are out of the question.

elementaryhistoryteacher said...

I enjoyed your list and agree with all five things. Thanks for reminding me about the pencil sharpener.....I need to purchase a new one. Seems I can't find one that will make it through a whole year. I bought 4 last year (not the cheap ones either).

GuusjeM said...

I'm not missing:
1. having to be at work at 6:45
2. in-services
3. fire drills
4. gobbleing my lunch in 15 min.
5. Always having to be "nice" - I am amusing myself this summer by not being nice to children!!

Tim Fredrick's ELA Teaching Blog said...

I use my tranparency maching every once in a while. I swear that I put a bulb in and I get three uses out of it. The supply people in the office think I throw them against the wall. Someone could make a lot of money inventing a reliable overhead bulb!

Mister Teacher said...

Yeah, no doubt that person would be RICH!

And G, I agree wholeheartedly about the pain in the buttocks that is our lunch period! I come from the engineering world, where one hour lunch is the norm, and that sometimes stretches even farther! Now, I'm supposed to eat in 20 minutes?