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Tuesday, December 14, 2010

I want my 2 dollars!

Well, I'm sorry to say that my district (or possibly my principal) has screwed up and once again, there are issues with my paycheck. Not just me, but many of the teachers at my school as well.

Back in April, teachers at my school were asked to return bonus money that had been deposited into our accounts -- even though the district payroll office had told us to "spend it in good health."

Now, we're finding that stipends and pay-for-performance bonuses, which were supposed to be included on this month's paycheck, are not on there.

So I have a few ideas for how the district can earn some money in order to pay us what they've promised us.

1) Charge bag fees.
I heard this morning that the airlines mad 2.5 billion dollars this year on bag fees alone. Just think, if every kid with a backpack is charged a quarter, every day -- we'll be rich by summer!

2) Mandatory nap time across the district: 1-2.
If all the lights are off for this one hour every day, the potential energy savings could be tremendous!

3) Selling Hot Cheetos
I don't pretend to understand it, but Hot Cheetos to my kids are equivalent to Crack Cocaine to Lindsey Lohan. We could buy bags of Hot Cheetos for 50 cents each and sell them at the apartments for $3 each. Heck, we could probably sell them for $10 each.

Whatever happens, I just hope the district gets it together and gives us the money they've promised us. I'm reminded of the final scene of National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, where Clark W Griswold berates his boss with the line, "If you don't want to give out bonuses, fine! But when some of us are counting on them to make ends meet..." and the cop says, "That's pretty low, mister. If I had a rubber hose, I would beat you..."


HappyChyck said...

OMG! Every time you start talking about Hot Cheetos, I can't help but laugh. So true! What do they put in that stuff?!?

Your ideas are great. Much better than selling lemonade.

You should put out a tip jar. Who doesn't have a tip jar these days?

Christy said...

ok, I have to concur with the hot cheetos. Just looking at them makes me nauseous, but the kids suck 'em down like beer in a speakeasy.

Washington State is facing a $6 BILLION projected deficit next year, so we are expecing some deep cuts to the unimportant stuff like education and social services.

Mister Teacher said...

A tip jar would just be pathetic. It would be empty all the time. Unless I "primed" it by putting in my own money, in which case it would just be stolen money.

Christy, oof. I don't envy you that.

Anonymous said...

Naptime has a lot of merits, I think. Also, the bonus situation could be worse. I was told I "did not enroll" and while I not only remember enrolling, I also remember printing out the confirmation sheet (almost positive) I can't find it anywhere. I think I'd still be SOL though because our middle school teachers got the bonus and the high school teachers missed it. Even though I teach both, I am coded as a high school employee, so..... either way, I was out of luck this year.

Jason Oller said...

Oh wow! I have not commented on here in a while! And hot cheetos would sell quickly. We sell the bags for 50 cents at the Little Store(that is what we call the concession stand and it has been called that since before noah was on the ark!) and at games at my school and they sell like crazy!

Maybe y'all should get a government bail out of a few billion and every teacher should bet a 10 to 20 thousand dollar bonus!

bun2bon said...

I am pro-mandatory nap time.