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Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Everybody loves vomit

What is it exactly about vomit and kids? Or perhaps vomit and people in general? It might seem like an odd question, but take a moment to consider people's reaction to vomit. Personally, MY reaction to someone vomiting is to get as far away as possible from that person and that hurlage. However, my kids, and many kids I have observed in the past few years, don't have that same reaction.

Yesterday, I was stooped down by one of my students' desks, helping him with a problem. All of a sudden, from the other side of the desk, I hear the sound of 500 wet paper clips hitting the floor -- ah yes, someone has blown chunks.

I stand up and see this girl staring at me with a dazed look in her eye, and a stained shirt. She's waiting to be told what to do. Had I shouted, "VOMIT!" she probably would have puked again. Had I shouted, "JUGGLE BOWLING PINS!" she might have attempted it. Instead, I shouted, "GO TO THE BATHROOM!"

Meanwhile, every other eyeball in the room is riveted to the puddle of puke on the floor. WHY??? Why do these kids STARE at throw up??? The sarcastic side of me came out, and I couldn't help but say, "PLEASE! Keep staring at the throw up! Let's all get a REALLY good look and make ourselves sick!!" I should have invited them all to bring a camera next time, for posterity's sake.

In other, less sickening, news, this week's Mr. Teacher column on is titled This Weak's Columm, and it tackles the issue of public misspellings. Company signs, city slogans, text messages, you name it. Check it out!

Also, please check out this week's Carnival of Education, now running over at Steve My article about weird arrangements of the human skeleton is over there, along with several other gems.


Edna Lee said...

I'm not sure what the fascination is with barf, but it sure holds their attention better than I can. Maybe I should consider wearing some in my hair?

Maybe not...

Unknown said...

A few years back, while chaperoning a class trip to San Antonio, I learned this useful tip:
If a child looks kind of green, and is sitting in a chair, you should not go squat down next to them to see if they are alright. They will throw up on your pants, particularly if you are at a restaurant, and have no way to get back to the motel for clean pants for a number of hours, particularly if it is a chilly evening, and you will be really uncomfortable in pants you have rinsed out in a bathroom sink.
... something to keep in mind.

Melissa B. said...

Ahhh, the Vomitus Eruptus lesson. I've taught that one a few times, too!

HappyChyck said...

Those brussel sprouts I ate for lunch didn't set with me today, and I was about 2 seconds away from a launch myself. LOL. Like the stupid kid, I didn't go running for the bathroom. I just stood there hoping it wouldn't happen. And it didn't. But it could have. (I was hovering near the trash can, though, just in case.) I kind of know how she felt. Disbelief. Who throws up in the classroom? So lame!

Mister Teacher said...

Fake barf in the hair only, edna lee.

Katie, it certainly sounds like you learned a valuable lesson that you will not soon be forgetting...