9 months???

I've been wanting to make one of these snarky pictures for a while, and so I finally did!

Carnival of Education

It's time once again for the Carnival of Education, put together with love and care (and intense heat) by Carol of Bellringers!

Help a teacha out?

Hey all,
I am planning a promotional event (stunt) for Learn Me Good in a few weeks, and I really need your help.  This would not require more than a few minutes of your time and a few kind words about Learn Me Good.

If you would be willing to help (and I'm in your debt if you do), please send me an email (learnmegood2@yahoo.com) and say, "I'm in," or "I'll help," or, "I'd love to have your quintuplets." 

I'll send out further details through email later.

Thank you in advance!

Missing the point...

Did you ever find yourself telling the kids, " Please throw your trash IN the trash can, not NEAR the trash can."

SCIENCE!!

I got an email the other day asking me to become an affiliate for this new science program for elementary school kids. I took a look, and it looks pretty good! I think it's definitely something that parents of grade schoolers would be interested in, especially those with kids who have truly scientific and curious minds.

Check it out and see what you think.
Click Here!



“The Amazing Science Discovery Series”
– How Science Should Be Taught To Our Kids

Science is one of those subjects that have so much potential to captivate our imagination. It’s sad that a lot of people think of Science as a difficult subject. It’s especially disheartening to see kids giving up on it as they mature.
Science is a subject that comes naturally to kids. Who knows of a child who isn’t fascinated by dinosaurs or space travel? Questions such as “Why do rainbows appear in the sky?” or “How do airplanes fly?” are just some of the science-related wonders that kids ask about.
As parents, we exert a lot of influence over our children’s preferences. That’s why as early as possible, getting children involved and interested in science can make a big difference in how they perform in school and their overall confidence in their ability to learn and apply scientific concepts. You shouldn’t wait till your child shows poor grades in school. By then, it could be too late. The earlier you can plant the seeds of love for science, the more vibrantly it will flourish.
If you are a parent who would like to help your children discover how fascinating the world of science is, check out the book “The Amazing Science Discovery Series”. This series is composed of 5 eBooks and deals with the Science subjects that are the standard fare for children in the first to fifth grade levels.
The great thing about this book is the easy language it uses to discuss the various concepts that children will be learning in school. It also goes into anecdotes and interesting historical stories about how scientists were able to establish the concepts in the first place. I love these stories because they really allow kids to see Science and scientific discovery as something that they, too, are capable of. The eBooks also go on to give easy and simple experiments and projects that you can do together, at home, to interact further with the concepts that are being discussed.
It’s a treasure for any family to have, and a must-read for every parent who would like to raise kids who enjoy science and are confident in their abilities to excel in this subject. It’s never too late to start, and there’s no such thing as too much encouragement when it comes to science. Our kids need all the help they can get.
If you want to learn more about it, you can do so by visiting the series’ website here:
http://www.amazingsciencediscovery.com

Finish my line!

Now that the big Summer Comedy Event is up and running, it's my turn to take it for a spin!

Finish the line I've provided with something funny, witty, provocative, or bat-s crazy. Do it the best, and you could win a copy of one of my books!

This contest runs from today through this Friday so you have plenty of time to get those creative juices flowing.

If you have a Twitter account, please post your line with the hash tags #finishtheline and #humorcontest.

If you don't have a Twitter account, post your line here on the blog as a comment OR on the learnmegood Facebook page.

10 great lessons

Earlier this week, Joel of So You Want to Teach? put up a post titled "10 Things I have Learned in 10 Years."

This is definitely worth a read! While there are certainly other truths to teaching, Joel's 10 are right up there in terms of importance.  Even if we don't ALWAYS love EVERY student (per rule #1)...

Summer Comedy Event!

Happy summer, everyone!!! Maybe it's just me, but this was an incredibly long and difficult school year, and I am exceptionally happy to be done with it and on to a bit of a break!

Or at least as much of a break as one can have with a less-than-a-month old son in the house. :)

So I've been collaborating recently with some other humor writers, and we've come up with a plan to hold an ongoing humor contest over the course of the summer.

Here's how it will work. One of us will post the beginning of a line on Twitter, maybe something along the lines of "I hate it when my pet lizard..." and you take a shot at finishing the line.

The entry judged to be the best by that week's author will win a copy of that author's book!

Each contest will run from Monday through Friday, with judging happening over the weekend. The majority of the contest will take place on Twitter and Facebook, and ideally, you will be exposed to some great new writers!

The first contest will begin this Monday, June 4th, so check back soon for the #humorcontest news!

THIS is easy??

Yesterday, I began to teach the kids how to do a 2-digit by 2-digit multiplication problem. I began by writing 43X32 on the board and asking the kids to just try to answer it.
The ONE kid who got it right and knew how to do this kind of problem already was the girl who didn't know how old she was, who told me that 5 + 3 was "so very hard," and who often forgets things over a long weekend.
Go figure.

A little experiment

When kids come running down the hall and I shout, "STOP RUNNING!" it has just about zero effect on them. So I'm thinking about seeing how they react to something totally random, like, "NO SMOKING!!" or, "GOD SAVE THE QUEEN!!"
The sheer confusion alone should stop them in their tracks.

Non Sequitors

My day was pretty lively today.  Here were a few bullet points... 

I have a set of liquid measurement containers that fit into one another much like Russian nesting dolls. Today, as I was pulling them out one at a time, much to the amazement of my kids, I kept hearing one of them say, "You gotta be kidding me."
Cracked me up!!

This was how my statement was intended to go: "When we get back from specials, I'm going to introduce you to Gallon Man."
Instead, I got as far as, "I'm going to introduce you to..." when I was interrupted by a boy saying, "Mr. Snowflakes!"

I had a sub for the last hour of class today. I asked her to have the kids take a big piece of paper, create their own word problem, solve it, and illustrate it. I even drew an example of what it would look like.
Just got back to my classroom, and I have 10 products that all have exactly the same word problem--my example problem.  Aaarrrgghh! 

Doesn't take much to impress...

Really don't think I can do this one justice in print, but here goes...
At recess, my kids swarmed around me to ask about the baby. Our schedule was mixed up because of ITBS in the lower grades, so some of the kids hadn't seen me yet.
Someone asked what the baby's name was, and I answered, "Andrew Warren Pearson."
My little muppet excitedly shouted, "Oooh, PEARSON!"

Yes, we opted to go with the non-traditional practice of giving our baby OUR last name...

Go the F$@K to sleep

After a couple of nights with hardly any sleep due to a baby who screams and cries all the time (except when he's feeding, when he falls asleep), I have a greater understanding of why a parent might name their kid that name pronounced "Sha-theed" (spelled like you-know-what).

Stop! Baby-Time!

My son was born today! And I feel like Mustafa looking upon Simba (but without all the hyenas).

My only disappointment today was that I didn't actually get to use the Baby-Time drill with my kids. But my next door neighbor teacher said that she would do it for me. She told me that she went out into the hall this morning and told the kids, "Boys and girls, Mister Teacher won't be here this morning. Can anybody guess why!"
She said that they all smiled and said, "Baby Time!" and cheered.
These will be good kids to loop up with next year.

One... Giant... Leap Forward

So it sounds like I will be moved to 4th grade next year. Not entirely sure how I feel about that yet. I did share the news with a small handful of kids as we were walking out to buses, and they were excited at the prospect of having me as their teacher again.

Guest teacher, Jacques Cousteau

The much anticipated Field Trip was today!  HOORAY!!

There was a teensy tiny problem at the beginning of our trip.  We were outside waiting for the buses at 8:30, when another teacher came out and told us that we had actually planned the trip for 11-2 and that the buses would not be arriving until 10:30.  Wondering who the shmuck was who got the timing wrong?  Yeah, let's just say the name rhymes with Sister Reacher.

The teachers conferred, and with a 4-3 vote, we decided NOT to have the kids just sit where they were for 2 hours.  Instead, we went back inside and worked on the science projects a bit.

We had planned on being back at school in time for our lunch, but with our new time frame, we were in a bit of a quandry as to when we would get to eat lunch.  Miraculously, even though I had never asked for portable lunches, somehow the cafeteria ladies had prepared sack lunches anyway, and that was a saving grace.  We ate outside at 10, then headed off to meet the buses again.

Once we were there, it was a blast.  Another teacher did not have quite the same fun experience as me, saying her kids would not behave and gave our school a really bad name.  But the kids that were in my group were, for the most part, pretty well behaved, especially after my colleague and I came down on them hard at the beginning for running and screaming.  They did well to walk and talk with inside voices after that.

We saw turtles.  We saw Angel Fish.  We saw an albino crocodile.  We saw sharks sitting at the bottom of the tank.  This was odd, because I thought sharks HAD to keep moving, or they would die.  One of the other teachers suggested that there was a current at the bottom of the tank, and that satisfied the sharks' oxygen intake.

The neatest part, though, was the stingray tank.  All of the kids, and teachers of course, got to dip their hands into the tank and actually "pet" the sting rays.  If you've never touched a sting ray (or manta, they're similar), it's a very interesting feel.  Their backs are kind of oily and slimy, and it was like touching one of my student's gelled up hair.

It was a lot of fun watching the kids yelp with fear-tinged excitement when they first touched the rays, and then became used to it and started petting them in earnest.  A few of the rays even swam right up against the glass and came considerably out of the water!

I get to take a field trip by myself tomorrow, as I've been summoned downtown for jury duty.  I don't think I'll have to serve, as I loudly advocate tarring and feathering for even the slightest crime.  Jaywalking, not using blinkers when changing lanes, littering.

Justice will be served!

Baby, Baby, Baby, OH!

During tutoring today, several of the boys told me that they were writers. Good for them! When I asked what they wrote about, it seems that most of the stories involve Justin Beiber being pushed off mountains, out of airplanes, and off tall buildings.
Good for them, indeed!

Thank you, my dear chap

As I was passing out folders at the end of the day, I called one boy's name, and he replied, "Right here, my good man!"

I asked him, "What did you say?" because I wasn't sure if he had really said what I thought I had heard! He repeated it and then added, "I learned that from tv! A spy movie!"

You do the math

Today we gave the very first ever 3rd grade STAAR test. (The extra A is for Avocado!)  Today's test was the Math test, so I was pretty understandably stressed and worried about how it would go.  One of the few changes that teachers actually KNEW of was that children would NOT be allowed to have all day to take it (4 hour time limit for most).  We also had heard that it would be much more rigorous (read, ridiculously harder) than the old TAKS, but since nobody had ever actually seen any true STAAR questions, we didn't really know what to expect.

I certainly wasn't expecting to see the level of difficulty that I saw today.  Without going into specifics, because I don't want to get in trouble, I'll just say that there were LOTS of questions that involved 2, 3, and even 4 steps before arriving at the correct answer.

I can't directly quote any of the questions, but I'm going to write my own problem below that generally sums up what most of the questions were like today on this THIRD GRADE test given to mostly ENGLISH as a SECOND LANGUAGE students..


Talukadiah arrived home at 4:55, after a long day of planting magic beans on his 449 square foot plot of property in Northern Gnome, Alaska.  He read that there had been 13 inches of snow fall that night, following twice as much the week before!  His 3 brothers and 5 sisters each had planted 45 magic beans, with one of those sisters, Groznzk, then planting 12 more.  After a nice 3 course meal, Talukadiah and his family, minus one brother, compared their earnings.  In all, they had made $450.  The older brother got to keep 1/9 of this, while the older sister got to keep 1/10 of the remaining money.  Talukadiah normally put away all but $5 of his earnings in a bag under his mattress, but only weeks ending in an even-numbered day.  He looked at the calendar and saw that it was Wednesday, December 4, that it was 14 degrees F outside, and that 25 minutes had passed since his arrival home.  If Talukadiah is 8 inches taller than his younger brother, how much money is in the bag underneath his mattress?  Also, Symmetry.


Tomorrow is round 2, the STAAR Reading test, and hopefully there won't be any stories like The Hare and the Pineapple.

Got the analogy!

For some time now, I've been trying to think of a valid analogy to use that expresses to my kids the importance of showing their work BEFORE choosing an answer and the ridiculousness of going back and circling words and showing work AFTER they've already filled in an answer bubble.

An AGE-APPROPRIATE analogy.  While I love Tim Allen's stand-up line, "What, do you wipe your A-- THEN take a S---?" -- it's hardly safe for the classroom.

A couple of weeks, it finally came to me, right in the middle of a small speech reiterating the comments made in my first paragraph.  I've shared it with both classes now, got laughs from both, and it's a keeper.  So here it is...

You wouldn't spend all day playing or swimming out in the sun and THEN come home and put on sunscreen, would you?  No, that's backwards!

Then of course I relate the sunscreen to work shown, playing or swimming to taking the test, and turning a lobsteriffic shade of crimson to getting the question wrong.