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Tuesday, September 26, 2006

The Denim Nazi


This was the imperative I was left with (I’m paraphrasing) after our staff meeting yesterday. We were told at the beginning of the year that if we had perfect attendance for the first 6 weeks, we would be allowed to wear blue jeans on Fridays for the next 6 week period. So when the first 6 weeks ended last Friday, I was very happy to see that none of the third grade teachers had missed a single day of school. Blue jean Fridays for us all!! Could Margerita Mondays be far behind?

Alas, then came the cold, cruel reality, like a slap in the face from a recently thawed caveman. At the meeting yesterday, our principal said she hoped that the blue jeans list would be out early this week. Mrs. Educator, sitting in front of me, yelled out, “Third grade was perfect!” To which our principal replied, “No, I know that Mister Teacher missed a day at the beginning of the year. You know, it doesn’t just include the school days.”

Yeah, the week before school started, during the pre-school teacher prep period, my grandmother passed away, and I went to the funeral that Friday. So I missed out on a few extra hours of decorating my classroom, an extra table being moved into my room, and apparently, 6 weeks of denim Fridays.

I just feel like such a fool. How ludicrously stupid of me to assume that “the first 6 weeks” meant 6 weeks’ worth of educational days!!

Here are some other foolish assumptions I have made recently:
The Sun will rise in the East each morning.
Oklahoma will remain land-locked.
7th Heaven will continue to defy cancellation.

I can already see the discussion I’ll be having with my students this Friday.
“Mister Teacher, how come you’re the only third grade teacher not wearing blue jeans?”
“Because I was absent one day.”
“But you’ve been here every day we were here!”
“Exactly, my children. Exactly.”

One of my students brought me a gift this morning. She said it was for being such a great teacher. It was an egg. A raw, unpackaged chicken egg.

I may not have been up to muster for perfect attendance, but by golly, I have the “juevos” to prove what a great teacher I am! Who’s the yolk on now???


Unknown said...

I have gotten some random gifts from students, but nothing that would beat an egg.

I did get a trout for Halloween when I was a kid, but that is a different story.

Anonymous said...

You are not allowed to wear jeans because you missed some hours?!

Anonymous said...

On the down side, bummer about the kibash on Blue Jean Fridays. On the up side, your student has extremely original gift giving skills ... or the only thing she had to give was an egg. Either way, it's all about the eggs. ;)

Mister Teacher said...

Actually, she told me the egg was the only thing she could find. And in lieu of an egg, she tried to give Mrs. Educator a dollar today...

Fish for Halloween? I'll bet those people got toilet papered every year...

Mike in Texas said...

How DARE you take a day off for a loved one's funeral.

As much as I gripe about my boss, I do have to say she was very good to me when my mother passed away in 2005. I was told to take as much time as I felt I needed and not to worry about school that my responsibilities would be taken care of.

HappyChyck said...

The whole jeans reward just stinks anyway. I guess because it seems like an incentive for the kids or something. Bummer dude.

At least you received a creative gift!

Mrs. T said...

I am completely bewildered by this idiotic decree from your "superiors". What happens if you wear jeans anyway? Do they fire you? Does it go on your "permanent record"? Come on!

Anonymous said...

How motivational. I think maybe I would think of taking a few extra days off to make up for my disappointment. I think being punished for your grandmother's death is sick. I guess you should have had her die a bit earlier to miss your work day or just had her mumified so you could bring her to school with you. It makes no sense and is really silly. What an impressive leader.

I love the gift. The child is mush the more mature individual. At least he or she has a generous soul.

Mister Teacher said...

It wasn't even a school day that I took off. It was the final day of room preparation, and I had already set up my room.
Oh, and yesterday, in the morning announcements, our principal asked the boys and girls to look around and see if their teachers were wearing blue jeans, because that represented their commitment and dedication...

Rose, the egg was an... interesting gift, but the girl is most definitely NOT mature. hehehe

Anonymous said...

That is beyond ridiculous!!! Is there no way you can talk to this administrator??? We are given jean Friday period...nothing more to it than that. When I taught in DeSoto, we weren't allowed to wear jeans but khaki's and a spirit shirt for casual Fridays...What hog wash...Kids LOVE it if you dress a little "cooler" than some pompass dorks.....I could go on and on but I won't! I'm sorry you work for such a jerk!