The kids took a test, and they really tested me

Tuesday and Wednesday of this week, I had to venture back into the valley of the shadow of death (aka, the 5th grade hallway) to administer the second round of TAKS tests. The kids who didn't pass their reading and/or math tests the first time around "get" another chance to pass. I had a group of 13 each day (9 were the same both days, 4 swapped out since they only failed one of the tests), and my class had a sub.

I'll state right up front that a few of these kids really DID seem to care that they hadn't passed, and these kids looked like they were making a valiant effort to pass this second time around. More than a handful of them, though, obviously didn't care one bit that they hadn't passed the first time, and this was just another day to be lazy for them.

Here are a few highlights:

-- One kid kept falling asleep, before 10 am even, and when I asked him what time he had gone to bed the night before, he had no idea. Not a good sign for the math test if you can't even read a clock.

-- Any time two molecules bumped against each other, there was apparently enough noise generated for all of the kids to stop working and look around the room.

-- There was no bathroom monitor on the hallway, so the kids were even more prone than ever to want to go to the bathroom 6-10 times an hour.

-- One kid broke 3 pencils in the first 2 hours, before I threatened that he'd have to use a crayon on his test if he broke another.

-- One boy asked to use the bathroom, and I told him yes, but he needed to be back in his seat in 2 minutes. He was able to do this. 15 minutes later, he asked to use the restroom again. I said, "No, you just went 15 minutes ago!" He answered, "I gotta do something else now!" I still said no, and he spent the next 2o minutes bent over in his chair, grabbing his ankles.

-- After lunch, I passed the tests back out to the kids. One kid's test had barely touched his desk when he was already raising his hand to tell me he was done. Way to take the advice, "Don't turn in your test before lunch" to the absolute letter!! (Turns out he had forgotten to fill in one answer on his bubble sheet, and it took him another hour -- and 3 more attempts to turn it in -- before he finally found it.)

-- One kid, after turning in his test, zipped his jacket up over his head and began swaying and rocking, at one point, hitting himself in the face several times. I didn't stop him because I didn't see how it was possible for him to actually lower his intellect that way.

Today, by comparison, was heavenly. I was back with my own kids, and they were happy to see me, and the feeling was mutual.

What are they breathing on the bus?

I may have mentioned it before once or twice, but at my school, we all have bus duty at 3:00. Since about 90% of our kids ride a bus to get home, we have roughly 10 buses, and we all have to get the kids loaded up and shipped home.

Most of these kids have been riding a bus since kindergarten. You would think they would have gotten the routine down by now. Of course, you would think they would also know by now that they are not supposed to climb on toilets, talk during tests, or draw obscene pictures on their own faces. Go figure.

Anyway, I have duty on one of the "better" buses. By that, I mean that the kids aren't particularly violent or disrespectful. They don't hang out the windows cussing at everyone within 50 feet. They don't throw dense fruit (which the school now helpfully passes out every Tuesday) at each other on the bus.

However, they also seem to step onto the bus and lose all rationality. Which makes me wonder if perhaps the bus exhausts are actually pointed INTO the cabin of the bus somehow? Maybe my friend The Bus Driver can weigh in here...

I get on the bus to help get the kids in place. I see kids turned around, peering over the back of their seat. I have seen kids STANDING on the seat. Today, there was a kid rolling his (eaten) apple core across the floor. There are girls that come in and sit 3 to a seat, with the 3rd turned so her legs block the aisle, not allowing other kids to pass by.

If I had a nickel for every time I told a kid to sit down on the bus, I would never want for ketchup again.

It's kind of a "chugga-chugga-chinka" sound

You know how when you take your car into the mechanic because it's making that weird sound, but then it doesn't actually make that sound while you're at the mechanic's? Or when you go to the doctor because something is really bothering you, but then it's fine for the duration of the office visit?

Well, I had the kid-equivalent version of that today.

We have a math coach at our school for a couple of days a week this year, and after meeting with her yesterday, we arranged for her to observe my class today. I wanted her to especially see my misbehaving, non-attention-paying, low academic afternoon class.

And wouldn't you know it -- that class was spectacular today! They were explaining things, they were using math words, they were participating... they were even behaving better than usual.

Of course, there were a couple that were far less than perfect. My ADD boy has for some reason developed loud hiccups for the past couple of days, and apparently they are contagious, as another child started mid-class as well.

But overall, the kids did as they were asked, they gave good answers to my questions while going over homework, and they seemed to listen.

The coach told me later, "You have some great kids!"

While I certainly never want to nay-say a comment like that, I still had to protest just a bit, saying, "But they're not usually like that!!"

Overall, though, it made for a pleasant day.

In my morning class, the counselor did a guidance lesson on college and career choice, and the kids got a page asking what job they aspired to. I had several future doctors, soldiers, and teachers. I also had 2 girls (bright, in my opinion) write that they want to work at Jack-in-the-Box when they grow up.

Hey, ya gotta have goals, right?