At least I hope it is just the Monday blahs. I have felt really down today. Maybe it is partly because I am recovering from a cold. Maybe it is partly because I feel sore all over (either from volleyball or pulling weeds?). Maybe it is because I didn't sleep well last night.
But I think it is mostly due to the fact that I came into my classroom - after being absent on Friday - to find chairs in disarray, desks with papers falling out, a whole box of kleenex gone, a bottle of hand sanitizer broken and empty...
And then I have the kids that just beat me down this year. The kids who fail the tests, who don't do their homework, who don't pay attention, and who just don't care. I know that there are always kids who struggle, but I think part of my mini-depression is that we have spent a solid 2 weeks on subtraction and regrouping, and I had 6 kids who absolutely BOMBED the test. Despite the fact that I worked extensively with these kids in small groups, and they could do it when they were with me, they just didn't care enough to do it the right way on the test!
I feel like the average to high kids in my class are really getting gypped because I am always having to slow down to get one of these lower kids back on track, or just onto the track in the first place. Yet I am not quite at a point where I just want to leave these low kids to totally fall behind.
I'm just frustrated. Incredibly frustrated. And unlike previous years, I am having a lot of trouble finding the humor in daily activities with this group.
I also saw the future of some of my kids today after work. I stopped by Subway, and the guy making my sandwich made me think of how some of my kids are going to be in about 10 years. This guy didn't have a clue as to what he was doing. I had to point out that he hadn't put enough slices of turkey on the bread, and he seemed to be having trouble counting out the tomatoes. Thankfully, someone else was working the cash register.
Maybe Tuesday will be kinder and gentler...
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8 comments:
I'm sorry you're having a tough year. I think there's a bad crop of third graders this year--our third graders are really rough, and their parents are worse! We are struggling at my school as well, but it stems from not getting the support we need (and deserve) from our administration. But, you know, everytime I feel like I've had enough, I can't imagine doing anything else. Think how sad it would be if work was "just a job". What we do is important! I hope you have a much better Tuesday.
so I'll expect another crappy year in 7 years when those 3rd graders get to be sophomores. Every now and then there is a year that makes you want to quit teaching and it's hard to get up and go to school every day. Those are the years that I make sure to leave my teaching behind at school whenever possible. I also have trouble coming back after a sub, ALWAYS.
I have definitely noticed and dealt with the internal fight between giving attention to those kids who requite constant one-on-one monitoring and giving attention to the kids who may get bored with school if you don't give them something challenging to do. It sucks. Good luck, I hope tomorrow goes better.
The day you described today is what I am seeing every day in my 4th grade classroom. It is so exhausting to try to keep these children entertained when you know they simply don't care. I am frustrated all day every day and I hate feeling that way. I hope things look up for you!
Thank you all for your supportive comments. It's nice to know it's not just me having a hard time!
Those days happen but it just helps to make the good days feel even better. You might not realize the positive impact you have on a student during these kind of days but years from now, one will come back and remind you. They will be watching to see how you handle the tough situations so they can learn how to do the same. Then you will think - I did?! Hang in there and the sun will come out again! :)
Chinese Astrology Explains it all.
These children were born in the year of the SLOTH.
Years ago some coaches at my school (one was also a fellow English teachers) gave me some advice: "You need to drink more or do more drugs."
Sometimes kids who know something and do it poorly on a test aren't bombing because they don't care. It can be anything from test anxiety to formatting or wording that is just a little different. I had the same problem with my fourth graders in math last week. We moved on to the next thing in math and today I had a "catch up" day for the tested stuff they missed (sometimes you have to let things cogitate for awhile before you go back to them). The kids who knew the stuff had an alternate activity and I worked with the ones who had problems on the test. They were fine with one exception, and he's just very low- not everyone has an IQ of 100.
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