Don't space me, bro!

Taking a cue from Reese's peanut butter cups (two great tastes that taste great together), Friday I merged our study of the solar system with some writing practice for next year's fourth-grade writing TAKS. I gave the kids a homework assignment that said write a story about what your life would be like if you live on another planet. (Optional advice: Keep your head out of Uranus, kids!)

As usual, I got a very humorous, interesting cross-section of responses. Here are a few of the best.

I would live in planet Jupiter. Because it is a little bit hot and a lot cold. I would be a monster and I would love it there. My name is billiBob just to let you know.

[Good to know. I wonder if he chose this name because I use it all the time when I make up word problems?]

If I lived on the Venus everybody will be on fire. The police won't be using guns because they are using fire. Fire will be water and it will rain fire. All of us could fly because fire is a gas and there won't be any kind of vehicle.

[Seems to me that Donald Trump would be quite at home there -- you're fired!]

I would like to see Jupiter to see the houses and how many bedrooms. One day one of my friends will be going to Jupiter because his mom wants to see what it's like over there.

[Yeah, I hear the real estate market on Jupiter is out of this world!]

If I lived in Mars I would be boiling and hot. And for my lunch I would eat hot rock.

[That might actually be an improvement over cafeteria food here on earth.]

If I lived in Neptune I would need a lot of jackets, maybe 20 jackets, gloves, hats, very bold sweaters and jackets.

[Very bold sweaters? Like the kind Bill Cosby used to wear?]

If I live another planet I would be sad because food in Mars are not good and I don't have a house, no bed.

[For this exact same reason, people who live in Arbys are sad.]

If I lived on Mars I would be dead because it doesn't have air. I'm supposed to wear a helmet.

[I kind of have to wonder if that second sentence is truly related to the planet homework, or if this kid was just letting me know his mental status.]

[This one is my favorite because of the closing comment]

I would live on Venus. I would bring a bag of T-shirts. Venus is a lot hotter than Earth. I would live a short life, because of the volcanoes. I would die when I reach Venus's atmosphere. I made a really bad choice of going to Venus.

Always an entertaining venture, my kids did not disappoint!