A few questions

Here in Texas, we go back to school next week for our 5 days of teacher in-service, then the kids show up on the 23rd. That's public school, anyway. My nephew goes to private school, and they started today!

To start getting back into the swing of things, I thought I'd post an old Mr. Teacher column from Education.com that ran back in August of 2008.

This column was titled Practice Q&A.

Here in Texas, the brand new school year just started yesterday. Class has been in session for a while in a few other places, and some kids don't begin until next week, after Labor Day. Since we're all at or around the first week of school, though, I thought I'd do a small service for all the parents out there and provide a few questions that their kids might be asked, along with examples of good answers and bad answers. This way, you can prep your kids on what to expect and how to get in the teacher's good graces.

For instance, the teacher may ask your child, "What is your name?"A GOOD answer would be, "Edward," or "Donisha," or whatever your child's real name is. A BAD answer would be, "My peeps call me Mac Daddy Zeno, the Pokémon Playa!"

Another question might be, "How did you spend your summer?" A typical GOOD answer would be, "It was fun. We went to Sea World and Cici’s Pizza, and I got a new puppy!" A rather BAD answer would be, "My dad got caught trying to smuggle illegal fighting llamas into the country, so we visited him every Thursday from one to four at the Henderson County lockup. Also, my new puppy smells like paint thinner."

The teacher will probably ask, "What did you learn last year?" Your child is providing a GOOD answer if she replies, "I learned my times tables, I learned how money is made, and I know the capital of China is Beijing."Conversely, your child is giving a BAD answer if he responds, "I learned that you can jimmy the lock on a teacher's car in five seconds with clear cover and the proper equipment."

Teachers often ask if their students know their parents’ phone numbers. A GOOD response to a question like this might be, "Yes, we practice it every night in case of an emergency." A BAD response to this question might be, "Yes, but I never call that number because it's $4.99 for the first minute and $1.99 for each additional minute."

Out of concern for safety, a teacher may ask your child, "How do you get home after school?" GOOD responses to this question are, "I take the school bus," or, "My granny picks me up out front." The answer of, "My mom's friend ‘Stinky’ usually picks me up on his rusty old Yamaha. We have to share a helmet," would definitely be a BAD answer.

Of course there are many other questions that teachers will be asking their students this week and all year long. Hopefully, this little primer will help guide your efforts in getting your kids ready to put their best foot forward.

One word of advice -- I would suggest practicing these questions and answers with your kid yourself. Results might not be so good if you leave the practice up to "Uncle Stinky."